Merry Christmas

Tis the season to be jolly ......



We have the best Christmas present ever .... dad (aka McTavish) is out of hospital and back home :o) All the family are meeting at my folks house for Christmas day which should be a great, if emotional occasion.

I will return after the Christmas period ... back to normal, I hope, to blog away the hours. I haven't been around much and apologise, but I didn't really have a great amount of time.

I'll tell you all about the staff night out where some poor slapper from another establishment had saved up all her pennies to buy a Christmas dress but had spent so much she obviously couldn't afford any knickers LOL and fell flat on her arse on the dancefloor to show everyone!!!!! LMFAO ... and the member of my staff who went outside for a cigarette and missed the raffle draw and her prize of 6 bottles of Moet ... shame ... maybe she'll have given up by next year PMSL

All that is left for tonight is to wish you all a fantastic Christmas and fabby New Year.

LOADS and loads of love, hugs and kisses .... Scotz XXXXXXXXXX

12 Days of Christmas

That time is nearly upon us again (an not a present bought yet!!) I was listening to Sarah Kennedy on BBC Radio 2 last week when she played this .....



I was in stitches and had to share it with you :o)

McTavish Update - He is now back in hospital in Perth - I will not be missing the journeys to Dundee! He is much better and actually smiling and joking again. Hopefully be out by Christmas :o)

Kylie and George

.... NO ... not another weird celebrity couple lol!!! Came across this and had such a laugh .....

The Drunk Test

The police in this great country of ours have been issued with a test to help them decide if someone is drunk or not! What next? Is it really that hard to spot a jakey?

Here are some of the indicators:

Noticeable change in behaviour: bad tempered, aggressive, offensive language, becoming loud, boisterous or disorderly, becoming physically violent, becoming incoherent, slurring or making mistakes in speech, becoming argumentative.

Lack of judgment: being careless with money, annoying other persons, inappropriate sexual behaviour, drinking quickly or competitively.

Clumsiness and loss of coordination: swaying, staggering, difficulty with walking, falling down, bumping into furniture, spilling drinks, difficulty in picking up change and fumbling for cigarettes or other items.

Decreased alertness: drowsiness, dozing or sleeping, rambling conversation, loss of train of thought, difficulty in paying attention, not understanding what is said, glassy eyes, lack of focus. Appearance - unkempt, dishevelled.

I am stone cold sober at this very moment in time but I could probably hit a few of these pointers LMFAO!!

I think these guys have the right idea .......



He was DEFFO pished as a fart!!! LOL

PANTO

It's that time of year again when the theatres are crammed full of families and kids watching stars of the TV and stage making absolute tw*ts of themselves ... yes ..... it's Panto season!!!

I am off to the King's Theatre in Glasgow on Wednesday with my godson (pmsl - I am the Godfather hahaha) to see their panto - Sleeping Beauty. I am looking forward to this as one of my all time favorite female comediennes, Karen Dunbar, has the role of Nanny BeGood.

I will meet up with my sister and her b/f, my aunt, youngest brother and godson for the raising of the curtain on Wednesday night. A few friends are also travelling through. I am NOT a fan of panto usually, but this has become a sad tradition of the last few years that we all meet up for some laughs.

The stalwart, Gerard Kelly, is also starring but sadly Elaine C Smith (Mary Doll) will not be on stage :o(

Here's hoping for a good laugh and some of the great Karen Dunbar wit ;o)

McTavish Update -
Dad is doing really well at the moment - I'm very cautious to say too much just in case he is jinxed yet again lol. He's hoping to be transferred back to the Perth hospital which will save us all a great deal of travelling every day I can tell you. The liver has started and he's off all machines and looking pretty good too! Fingers crossed that he may be out and home by Christmas :o)