Saturday, 1 November 2008

Ink

Been thinking about getting a tattoo .... very patriotic .... comments on this ...



maybe this ....

playing with my stones!



Some people have filthy minds!!! I meant playing with the curling stones!

Having NEVER stepped onto an ice-rink and NEVER played a ngame of curling - I was recruited by a curling team and placed into a league playing other teams who have been playing for many years.

Now, for those who have never heard of curling or have never seen a curling match on tv, here's a little intro ...

The aim of the game is to get your curling stones as close to the centre of the target (house) as possible and closer than your opposing teams stones. All of this is done by pushing 44lb granite stones up a sheet of ice. A bit like a game of bowls and a game of chess mixed together and played on ice.



Teams of four play against another team of four with each team member curling 2 stones each. The skip lets each team member know where to try and curl their stone each time and if you are not curling then you are sweeping! Little did I know just how energetic curling actually was.



The sport originated from Scotland and was played outside on frozen lakes. Records take the sport back to 1511 in Dunblane, Scotland.



Now ..... imagine the icy slippy pavement in winter ..... and then imagine that not being slippy enough and adding a smooth, slippy sole to one of your shoes and chasing after a 44lb polished, granite stone up a sheet of ice with a brush in your hand .... yep .... that's me :D hahahaha

Here's how it should be done ...



Anyway .. not content with training and coaching sessions and being recruited by a team I also joined another league ..... maybe the cold and the ice are my thing afterall pmsl

Monday, 13 October 2008

Wind Turbines

I was having a read at some old posts and found this from April 2007. I was out passing this spot again yesterday on the way to Sunday Dinner and had to stop to take a piccy or two.



This spot is about 10 minutes drive from my place and I love the views. Well, there goes my hard exterior image lmao. Scots likes the views in the countryside hahaha. Anyway, there were a lot of cars parked up with their occupants either walking through the hills, looking at the views or fishing on the loch.



I will turn the camera round a bit and show you the 'gorgeous' view of the "hidden" turbines ......



... now call me a bit thick if you like but, I can see a few white, giant turbines sticking out of the beautiful backdrop of the Ochil Hills in Clackmannanshire. I was a little puzzled as I thought they were to be HIDDEN from view. If I drive for and hour and over 60 miles, I can see them from the other side of the hills in Perthshire - very hidden NOT.

Now, I become a bit of a hypocrit here because I do now think that turbines are magical looking structures, towering above everyone and everything, slowly turning in the wind. I just don't think they should be placed in area of local beauty and interest, spoiling the view for evermore.

Puppy



Here are some pics of the gorgeous Collie puppy that my folks have running about their house.

He has been chasing everything and everyone that comes into the house. A right little bundle of fun.



I was hoping for the name "Hamish" but I will settle for "Skye" hahahaha

Thursday, 9 October 2008

Calvaliers and Roundheads


*** WARNING *** ADULT CONTENT *** WARNING ***

Well I said I would post about the "wee op" and here goes ...

From the heading some will be able to guess that the "wee op" was infact me allowing the surgeon to take a scalpel to my 'bits' and circumcise me. OUCH!



After plucking up the courage, after a LONG time, I decided that a problem that I had (phimosis) needed fixing and I wasn't going to put it off any longer. I did a lot of research on the internet and ploughed through all the rubbish from the "Pro Foreskin Lobby" - (jeez they are a fanatical bunch of weirdos)



and decided that I was going private for the op rather than having it done on the NHS. Other options for differnt solutions were not an option.



Why private? Well, until I started to research this problem I wasn't aware of the number of different "styles" of cut I can actually have. Now don't laugh!!! Sounds like going to the hairdressers - "What style would Sir like?" hahaha. NHS is a one style fits all.

I HATE hospitals and have a real, genuine fear of general anaesthetic so I searched out the best specialist surgeon I could and took the plunge to email and book a consultation. Within 20 minutes of sending an enquiry to the surgery I was emailed back by the Practice Manager and had my surgery booked for 1 week later and flights to London booked also. This is when I started to panic a little as things were moving VERY quickly ... possibly a little too quickly for my liking but with BA flights to London City Airport booked and paid for and the surgery and consultation paid for ... there was no pulling out now.

I didn't tell anyone what I was doing or anything about the surgery until 2 days before I was flying to get the chop. Even after letting family know that I was going into hospital for a bit of surgery, I still wasn't letting on what I was actually having done. My Mum was not happy that I was having surgery and I wasn't telling her or my Dad what I was having done. BUT .... this kind of op isn't the kind of conversation a mother, father and son should be having over the Sunday dinner table lol.

I flew done with no hassles at all ... and a lovely lunch on the plane courtesy of BA. I arrived in London at 13.05 and had the surgeons consultation at 13.25. Thankfully no time at all for worrying or talking myself out of the procedure.

I took a cab to the surgery and was met a reception by the theatre nurse and the practice manager. e sat down for a brief chat and to sign the papers etc before I was taken straight through to see Dr Z, the man who I was going to allow to become very intimate with me lmao.

I had a 30 minute consultation going through all the procedure from start to finish, the aftercare and the possible PROBLEMS!!!! It was then that I had to jump on the consulting table and get my trousers round my ankles for an examination. The EVIL NASTY PPAIN INDUCING BAST*RD only wanted to do something to me that was going to make me hit the roof with pain. "Can you suffer some pain for a short time for me to allow you to see what you will look like after surgery?" NO YOU FU*KING CANNOT. He did laugh and took it in good spirits. He decided it was probably best not to until I was 'frozen up'.

He took me through to the theatre room and I met the theatre nurse again. I was stripped to the waist and laid upon the bed, smothered in freezing cold iodine (as if I wasn't small enough with fear of getting the chop hahaha). It was then that the pain started to become real. 6 injections into my manhood OUCH OUCH OUCH. That was SOOOOOOOO painful and not something I ever wish to feel again lol. Dr Z then did what he wanted to do with no anaesthetic ... and then wanted me to look ... BLOOD! BLOOD everywhere. How the hell he expected me to go through THAT with no anaesthetic I don't know.



He got down to work and encouraged me to watch what was going on. I declined the offer ;o) Out of the corner of my eye I start to notice smoke coming from where he's working. The smell of burning flesh .... I can't go to a BBQ without having flashbacks lol. He was using something like a bleddy soldering iron to seal blood vessels.

The op was over quite quickly and he was sewing me up when I started to feel the needle. The last 5 or 6 stitches were a bit uncomfortable but I was being wrapped in pressure bandages and sent to a recovery room to drink lots of water.

Everything was fine, no pain and I was discharged. Off to the airport and flight back home.

The pain hit when I got home. I could not get any sleep for hours and managed to drift off for about an hour or so. I woke to find myself soaked in blood. PANIC !! I was NOT expecting to wake finding myself and the bedclothes covered in blood. Not just spots of the red stuff .... I was saturated. The pain was tear inducing and I decided this was not what should be happening and called Dr Z. He was fantastic and gave me instructions, advice and put my mind at rest.

I had to call for help from my folks. I could hardly walk hahaha John Wayne walking was my speciality lmao. I obviously explained to the folks what I had been through and within the hour I was being driven to the folks house to be looked after. It is VERY strange to be looked after when you are 34 and especially when I left home at 18 yrs old and being a very independent person ... this was quite difficult for me.

I wasn't allowed to shower or bath for a week - OMG - I love hot showers every day and this was a bit alien hahaha. After a week I was allowed to have a warm salt water bath and I had to CAREFULLY remove the pressure bandgae. Well .... the sight was a shock! My Gran had a new shoulder operation and her wound had 12 stitches. Now I am not bragging or anything .... BUT ... my "wee op" had 30 stitches. The sight of a mans prized posession covered in dried blood and swollen (not in a nice way) and looking like a crochet project gone wrong ... was not a good sight. The bath on the other hand was LOVELY! I had to take 2 of these warm salt baths a day.

Still in huge amounts of pain though and still walking like John Wayne. I was doing some more research on the internet when I came across a mens health site with an adult circumcision help forum. Thank God there were others who were sharing experiences and tips for faster recovery. I made a few really good mates on there and continue to chat to them.

The surgeon told me I would have 2 weeks off my work (I was on holidays at the time) give or take a week. He had told me of a guy who went back to work the following morning hahahahahaha ... I was the exception and had 3 weeks of pain. After the third week I was safe enough to be left alone and comfotable enough to be able to sit and drive.

Now, 3 months on everything is fine, back to normal, functioning fully and I am sssssoooooooooo glad that I eventually had something done about the wee problem hahaha.



Jeez ... this is a really long post and I expect you are all asleep by this time or thinking 'what a wuss he don't know what pain is'. hahahaha Believe me ... I don't ever want to experience pain like I have done with this.

Tuesday, 7 October 2008

meme

I have 'borrowed' this from newplanet. Hope he don't mind. Time to find out more about li'l old me ...

1. What was your best job?
The one I have now, although it may be my next one.

2. What were your worst jobs?
Paper Boy when I was a nipper, I hated the early mornings and being out in all weathers.

3. Tell me all the places you worked.
Newspaper shop, Health Food shop, Hotel (kid’s club), Outdoor Activity and Training Centre (Assistant Manager), School.

4. Tell me about your best friend.
My oldest and ‘bestest’ friend is Vicki. We have been mates for years and will remain so for years to come. We have decided that we will be grumpy old gits together in our retiring years, a bit like Jack, Victor and Isa hahaha(Chewin The Fat). We tell each other MOST things. There are some things she doesn’t know about me and I am sure there are some I don’t know about her.

5. Tell me about your family.
Direct family – Mum, Dad, 2 younger brothers and a younger sister and sister in law. Lots of aunts and uncles, cousins and hangers on ;o) One neice or nephew on the way xx

6. Tell me about your relatives.
Too many to mention ... see above.

7. What was your first car?
A Ford Escort. God, I loved that first car. It was a piece of trash and gave you a foot bath when it was raining, but it was my first car. It came to a spectacular end when it was crushed by Big Foot at a public display of monster machines. Ah, the fame!!!

8. Favourite movie star?
Jodie Foster.

9. Favourite entertainer?
Ms Victoria Wood, Ms Karen Dunbar, Mr Frankie Boyle and Mr Craig Hill – my taste is far and wide!

10. Favourite song?
At the moment it is .

11. What were your life changing moments?
Leaving home and going to Uni, first job, promotion, love, yadda yadda yadda

12. First girlfriend/boyfriend?
Oh Jeez. First girlfriend was a lass called Angela when I was about 10 yrs old. Aww the memories ;o) No boyfriend.

13. First kiss?
First kiss would be Angela but first real kiss was an older girl (ooh get me) called Elaine. Apparently when I was younger I was classed as cute by the older girls ... hmmmm now, did I play on that fact or wot!

14. What is the dumbest thing you have ever done?
Reverse my car along the road to let a car pass, and drive right into a tree! Ha ha ha ... so many people saw me do it. I was SO embarrassed.

15. Have you ever been arrested?
No. Came close on a night out in Glasgow but that’s a whole different story – young jumped up police officer! Huh

16. Political affiliation?
Swinger ... as in my vote ya filthy gits!

17. Have you voted for someone you wished you hadn't?
Erm ... nope.

18. Have you used drugs?
As little as possible. Don't like doctors or hospitals and stay away as much as possible.

19. Do you like to shop?
I hate shopping with a passion. I was dragged round shops by a lass every Saturday when I was at Uni – It took all the fun (if it was ever fun) out of shopping!

20. Best way to relax?
A hot bath with lots of bubbles, relaxing music and a glass of something bubbly.

21. Favourite thing to do alone?
The least said about this one the better I feel.

22. Ever had a one night stand?
No comment – I am an angel and have no desire to tarnish my halo ;o)

23. Do you save money?
Yes.

24. What hobbies do you spend money on?
Eating out and drinking (do they count), theatre, concerts, curling. Can’t think of any more at the moment.

25. If you found a $100 note, what would you do?
Lose it again. Well, what use would foreign money be to me?

26. Do you want children/more children?
Possibly. It feels like I have 200 of them with my job though.

27. Are you a good parent?
I am not a parent but with 200 youngsters in my care it feels like I am sometimes and I think I do a damn good job.

28. What makes a good parent?
Love, compassion, understanding, good listener, fair ... the list goes on and on

29. Are you romantic?
I am a romantic at heart. Long winter walks beside the river with the snow falling, arm in arm with A N Other, wrapped up warm, stopping at a roasted chestnut stall at the riverside market and eating those as we walk home to a roaring real log fire to enjoy the rest of the afternoon ;o)

30. Ever lose a pet?
Yes.

31. Dog or cat?
Dog.

32. Pets growing up?
4 dogs, rabbit, guinea pig, birds, hamsters, goldfish.

33. Sleep in the nude?
Sometimes, but not when it’s cold.

34. Favourite midnight snack?
roasted cheese sandwich with lashings of Lea & Perrins.

35. Do you exercise?
I do a little but I have let my gym membership lapse and should really get back into the gym. Used to be there 4 times a week (an no I wasn't 'just' perving) – jeez what a glutton for punishment.

36. Did you ever see your parents making love?
Thankfully, NEVER!!!

37. Peanut butter and what?
I hate peanut butter.

38. What is one food you will never give up?
Pasta.

39. What is a food you can live without?
Anything with a creamy sauce.

40. Favourite drink?
Coke – addicted to the stuff.

41. Perfect day?
Beautiful sunlight streaming through the window. Get up and open the door to the sounds of the sea lapping against the shore and the birds singing in the trees. Breakfast outside in the garden under the sun. Walk along the beach. Take a swim in the sea and lie under the sun to dry off ..... you get the picture ... Do I need to go on?

42. How many CDs do you own?
Far too many.

43. How many DVDs do you own?
Again, far too many.

44. Favourite thing to spend money on?
Food, drink and travel.

45. What is the weirdest thing about you?
Erm ... curl my tongue.

46. What is on your bedside table?
Lamp, alarm clock, phone and a book.

47. Are you cheap or thrifty?
A bit of both depending on my mood lol but prefer to be neither.

48. Ever been in love with two people at the same time?
No. Have I ever really been in love?

49. Grades in high school?
Not too good but they were good enough to get me into Uni and a job I love.

50. Favourite teacher and why?
Mrs Anderson. Old (really old) teacher who had actually taught my mum when she was at primary school too. She lived along the road from us and I used to get sent on messages to her house if she’d forgotten something. I still remember little tricks of the trade she taught me. When I became a teacher she offered me her Lochgelly Tause ;o) hahaha

51. Relatives in jail?
Nope.

52. Toppings on pizza?
I like plain cheese n tomato with torn basil leaves and pesto with black pepper and parmesan.

53. Black or white?
White or black underwear but not multicoloured.

54. Glass half full or half empty?
Kinda depends ... mostly half full unless I am in a really depressed mood.

55. Ever been to a food shelf?
Almost daily at the supermarket.

56. Ever milked a cow?
Nope. Cows are WAY to big and ugly to go near those bits!

57. Ever tipped a cow?
Nope. Poor beast!

58. Bath or shower?
Prefer a shower, although mine has given up the ghost this morning ... Imagine my reaction when I jumped under a freezing cold jet of water this morning! Hahaha I do like to relax in a hot bath though!

59. Mountains or the beach?
Beach.

60. Plane, train or automobile?
I love flying so planes all the way.

61. Favourite all time movie?
Too many good un’s to choose from.

62. Worst movie you have ever seen?
Hadalgo – it’s a long story, don’t ask!

63. Best concert you have been to?
Don’t laugh too much ... Deacon Blue. Was in Glasgow and the party started on the train with friends on the way through with bubbly and Pimms hahahaha A great meal, almost got caught up in a fight (see above almost arrested) blagged great area that we hadn’t paid for and had a great night.

64. Beer, wine or coffee?
Wine.

65. Best vacation?
Barbados or Egypt are probably the best and most memorable.

66. If you could retire tomorrow what would you do?
Travel round the world on a luxury cruise liner.

67. Worst vacation?
Haven’t had a bad one really.

68. Three places you would love to visit?
Kenya, Canada and NYC.

69. Worst boss?
Nasty bitch of a HT who didn’t back me up when I was assaulted by a pupil. She took action though when the little ****** assaulted her ;o) Oh how I laughed!

70. If you could do anything what would it be?
I am a great believer in the spirit life and trying not to be too similar to newplanet, I’d love to me able to speak to the spirit world as a medium.

71. Super powers you wish you had?
Wish I could fly.

72. Ever had a massage?
No. Couldn’t imagine anything worse. I hate being “exposed” and under someone’s control.

73. Ideal romantic dinner?
Gorgeous company, candlelit Italian meal, beautiful wine ..... and who knows. ;o)

74. Dumbest purchase you ever made?
My last car. Had my “turning 30 crisis” and bought a fabulous sports car but had no thought about the money I’d be shelling out on petrol every day as I travel over 60 miles a day to work.

75. Where did you find money when you were flat broke?
I have always had a job of some sort. I used credit cards (EVIL) and decided to get rid of them all (yes, I had 3 maxed out cards) as I was getting further and further into debt. Mum and Dad were FANTASTIC when I was desperate at Uni.

76. Ever sold blood?
Sold blood? What the hell????? I don’t even give blood to the Blood Transfusion Service – it’s mine, all mine!

77. What sporting event/concert/entertainment would you buy tickets to regardless of price?
I’ll have to think about that one.

78. Ever hit a jackpot on a slot machine?
Have won £25 on one once, but that was all.

79. Ever won the lottery?
The odd £10 here and there. My mum did get 5 of the 6 numbers though ;o)

80. What would you do with your lottery winnings?
Family, friends, charity, homes (yes, plural) cars and holidays.

81. Are you a neat freak?
At work - yes. At home – NO! Jeez, what a mess this place is in.

82. Can't stand being around people who_________?
... are so far up their own backsides they have lost touch with reality.

83. Crowds or small groups?
Small groups.

84. How old do you want to live to?
As long as I can.

85. Lose your sight or hearing?
Oh jeez. Erm ..... hearing I think, if I really had to choose.

86. Ever had a crush on a member of the same sex?
Erm ... yes. See answer to No. 4 hahaha

87. Pet peeves?
2 faced-ness (is there such a word?)

88. Most annoying/gross habit?
I don’t have any ... pfffffttt.

89. Sexiest parts of a member of the opposite/same sex?
Eyes and legs.

90. Major turn offs?
Burping, farting and swearing.

91. Tattoos?
Don’t have any atr the moment but I am searching for a fabby design for my back.

93. Piercings?
No. Don’t like piercings.

94. Plastic surgery - would you/have you?
No and no.

95. Computer geek?
Define geek.

96. Trekee?
Deffo not.

97. Play an instrument?
I used to play flute and cello when I was very young but to a very poor standard. My cello was taller than me hahaha.

98. Been in a band?
In a band - no. Have sung on stage in musicals though ;o)

99. Most embarrassing moment?
Realised that my flies were undone at the END of a parents night at school. Oh the shame. I was wearing very nice boxies though lol.

100. Nude beach yes or no?
Yes. How else would I get that all over tan that I lust after? Skinny dipping is very .... erm ... invigorating! lmao

SCATTERGORIES

GIVE IT A TRY.

SCATTERGORIES...it's harder than it looks!

Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following.
They have to be real places, names, things.. nothing made up!

WHAT IS YOUR NAME:
James

BOY NAME:
Jamie

4 LETTER WORD:
jump

GIRL NAME:
Jessica

OCCUPATION:
jazz musician

A COLOUR:
jade

SOMETHING YOU WEAR:
jersey

BEVERAGE:
juice

FOOD:
jambalaya

SOMETHING FOUND IN A BATHROOM:
jacuzzi

A PLACE :
Jamaica

REASON FOR BEING LATE:
jetlag

SOMETHING YOU SHOUT:
juuuuummmmpppp

Wednesday, 20 August 2008

a wee update

Just been having a wee chat with some maties - trying to take my mind off things .... life .... whatever!

I must have been a right nasty bast*rd in a past life cause the past few years have been SHITE! Not to me personally but to those around me.

Got a call from my dad to tell me that my uncle had been involved in a head on car smash and had been trapped for over 2 hours before being airlifted to hospital. Now in intensive care on a life support machine :( Been on machines now for a week. He is stable but critical. Same ICU that my dad was in - now that is spooky!


My own "wee problem" has almost fully healed lol - no more wincing pain when I move about and the swelling is all but disappeared. I can tell ya ..... I would never want to go through that amount of discomfort again :) - what a woose I am :D

I did say that I would tell you all about it (no piccys though ... I aint wanting an X rated blog) - and my next post will do just that .... men .... warning .... you may wish to cross your legs and hold the jewels tight ... it's eye watering stuff!

On a lighter note ... mum and dad got themselves a new puppy. He is gorgeous! A cute little black and white fluff ball border collie. I will upload a piccy or two of him soon.

Also ... went to a family BBQ 2 weeks ago and was told that I am gonna be an uncle ... yeah! An official uncle (I have a few unofficial nephews and neices!) - kid is gonna be spoiled. The "bump" ... there aint much of one but sis in law likes to think there is (3 months) .. has a nickname. Yes, my bro and his wife have nicknamed the bump. The 3 month scan looked so much like a baked bean they have called it Heinz. Thankfully not to be called that after it's born :o)

well .... just a quickie ... I will get round all the blogs that I love reading and visiting - kinda missing the stories, posts, pics and gossip!

Luv you all

XXXxxxXXX

Tuesday, 5 August 2008

OUCH

Howdy all in Blogland

Just a short message to say I am recovering from the surgery, very tender and popping painkillers like smarties!

If I had known a simple op was going to take weeks to heal I may not have bothered lol - I am VERY impatient and don't make a good patient hahaha

Staying with the family at the moment cause I haven't been able to do much but should be home and back to "normal" soon hahaha

Hope you are all well xxxxx

I'll tell you all about the burning flesh and smoke, 6 injections instead of 3, the bloodbath, delayed flights and a very sorry for himself Scotz in a post next week ... oh I can so tell everyone wants to hear my woes pmsl xx

Saturday, 19 July 2008

Tomorrows future

This was sent to me in an email and I thought I'd share ...




WHEN YOU THOUGHT I WASN'T LOOKING


A message every adult should read because children
are watching you and doing as you do, not as you say.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you hang my
first painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately
wanted to paint another one.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you feed a
stray cat, and I learned that it was good to be kind
to animals.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make my
favorite cake for me, and I learned that the little
things can be the special things in life.

When you thought I wasn't looking I heard you say a
prayer, and I knew that there is a God I could always
talk to, and I learned to trust in Him.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make a
meal and take it to a friend who was sick, and I
learned that we all have to help take care of each
other.

When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you give of
your time and money to help people who had nothing,
and I learned that those who have something should
give to those who don't.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you take care
of our house and everyone in it, and I learned we have
to take care of what we are given.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw how you
handled your responsibilities, even when you didn' t
feel good, and I learned that I would have to be
responsible when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw tears come
from your eyes, and I learned that sometimes things
hurt, but it's all right to cry.

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw that you
cared, and I wanted to be everything that I could be.

When you thought I wasn't looking I learned most of
life's lessons that I need to know to be a good and
productive person when I grow up.

When you thought I wasn't looking I looked at you and
wanted to say,'Thanks for all the things I saw when
you thought I wasn't looking.'

Each of us (parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, teacher, friend)
influences the life of a child.

What wine are you?

Being a bit of a lover of wine and bubbly, this was a must for me ...




You Are Chardonnay



Fresh, spirited, and classic - you have many facets to your personality.

You can be sweet and light. Or deep and complex.

You have a little bit of something to offer everyone... no wonder you're so popular.

Approachable and never smug, you are easy to get to know (and love!).



Deep down you are: Dependable and modest



Your partying style: Understated and polite



Your company is enjoyed best with: Cold or wild meat

Wednesday, 16 July 2008

FINISHED

After tripping over packs of wooden flooring for months I thought it was about time that I lifted the carpet in my lounge and fitted the new floor.

On impulse, I bought a whole load of antique oak flooring over a year ago and nearly killed my poor car driving it back from Glasgow. I had originally gone to Glasgow for a bit of a wander round the shops and wasn't expecting to have 14 x 16kg packs filling up the car.

I started yesterday afternoon and have been on my hands and knees since. All finished now .. phew! I now have wallpaper to strip, skirting to fit and then wallpaper to hang. I was hoping to get away with painting the walls but they are such a mess that I can't without having them all re-skimmed and I really can't be bothered with that.

The plan is to have the walls stripped and ready for wallpapering by Saturday. I may be forced to call on my mum to do the wallpapering for me .. she's a bit of an expert at it and she'll do it in half the time that I will ;o) - and what are mums for? hahaha

Monday, 14 July 2008

Back

My oh my ... it's been a long time ... but here I am back in blog world.

I have been catching up on blogs this morning. I can't actually believe that I am up so early in the morning at the start of week 3 of my holidays .... but I was woken up at 08:10 by the practice manager of a surgery that I am visiting next week and now can't get back to sleep! I am lazily typing this as I lie here in bed hahaha

I finally plucked the courage to have a wee problem fixed. Had I realised that it would mean me going for private healthcare and travelling to London for surgery ... I may have decided not to bother.

We do have a fabulous NHS service in this country - despite some flaws - but after deciding that I needed to get this done, I didn't want to wait for a consultant appointment and then wait a very long time for surgery appointment .... so Internet searching came into its own and off I went looking for the best surgeon I could find.

Now that the procedure is booked and flights paid for I am not looking forward to next Monday at all!

Men are typically not good dealing with medical things and because this is a problem of a "male only type" I don't relish the thought of a surgeons scalpel chopping away .. down below lol

My surgeon will meet with me to do an examination and consultation to discuss all the options open to me and then ... thankfully ... straight into theatre without the need to wait and worry and change my mind! Thankfully, it's not a long procedure and unlike the NHS, this guy is going to do the procedure under local anaesthetic rather than a general.

Am I looking forward to Monday? No!!!! Am I looking forward to the results? Well, after 2 weeks of bathing 3 times a day and pressure dressings and then a further 2 weeks of "light use" hahaha I wish there was even light duties at the moment lmao .. then yes I will be happier!

Sunday, 27 April 2008

Don't play with it!!!!

Get your filthy minds out of the gutter! We are talking food here. Do you remember your parents telling you not to play with your food? I wonder how long these took ....













Sunday, 20 April 2008

just for a laugh

I was sent a fantastic email with some alternative titles for kids books. They made me laugh so much that I thought I'd share them ...


THE WOMBLES GO HAPPY SLAPPING ...


THE VERY ANGRY CATERPILLAR ...


LITTLE MISS TEEN PERGNANCY ...


THE BIG NODDY DOGGING BOOK ...


THE SECRET GARDEN ... (took me a while to spot the type of garden this was!)


SPOT THE DOG ... (bit bitchy this one!)


OMG, WTF, BFG ...


BUNTY - DONNA'S ON THE GAME ...


BI-CURIOUS GEORGE ...


WHERE GLUE COMES FROM ...


LITTLE MISS TRANSVESTITE ...


I hope you have a good chuckle to yourselves, I certainly did :o)

Saturday, 12 April 2008

A bit of culture ...

I feel like a bit of a stranger in blog-land. I haven't been here for a wee bit due to being worked off my ass, medical issues of my own (nothing serious ... "men's problems" hahaha) family medical issues (thankfully not McTavish) and strange phone calls from a Private Investigator!!! I'll keep all of these for future use :o)

Anyway, I promised a bit of culture ....

I was out and about with a couple of friends and we decided to head off on our usual road trips on a cold and wet Sunday a couple of weeks ago.

After many miles, we ended up in Melrose and decided a culture trip to Melrose Abbey was in order.



Melrose Abbey was founded around 1136 by King David I and was dedicated to the Virgin Mary. Richard II, in retaliation for a raid by the Scots in 1385, sent a force North of the border which burnt the Abbey to the ground. Work started on the complete rebuilding of the Abbey almost as soon as Richard's forces had left, and it is the remains of this new building which we see now.



The heart of King Robert I (The Bruce) is buried in a leaden casket in Melrose Abbey. Widely recognised as the greatest knight in Christendom, Robert the Bruce had always wished to take part in a crusade. His wish was fulfilled only after his death, when his embalmed heart was carried in a leaden casket on a crusade by his great friend James Douglas who was killed in battle. Bruce's heart was brought back to Melrose and buried in the Abbey.



The inscription beside the place where his heart is buried reads:
"with gret worshyp has gert bery The kingis hart at the abbey Off Melros ..."
- roughly translated as - 'The King's heart buried with great solemnity at the Abbey of Melrose'.

When walking amongst the ruins and climbing the very narrow staircase to the roof platform of the Abbey, I saw many of the gargoyles with their strange faces and large open mouths for the rain water. The statues and large, towering spires with their fancy and elaborate carvings were gorgeous, but I was getting frozen to death in the biting cold wind and decided to head down the stairs and back to ground level again.




A beautiful and very peaceful place to visit, steeped in Scottish history. Highly recommended from me!